I am so excited to WRITE and I have no time to WRITE and I am bitter, bitter, bitter.

On the other hand: COBRA VIDEO WHICH ROCKS MY WORLD. I have a thing forcut for spoiler )

And BRENDON IS ON A BOAT.

And ZACK LOVES THE NEW PANIC MUSIC.

And SEANAN'S ZOMBIE BOOKS ARE GETTING PUBLISHED. (I am not over that yet. I may not be over that ever. Ten years from now when I run a hand over all three of them on my bookshelf, and stop to re-read that one awesome speech of Georgia's, and look up an hour later to realise I just re-read half the books AGAIN, I will STILL be going OMG THEY ARE PUBLISHED.)
The little *facts* about bandom that can make me smile whenever they pop into my head. Some personal moments, some bits of canon.

--Gerard and Lindsay. Getting married. IN MATCHING UNICORN T-SHIRTS.

--Bronx's lullaby. Duh.

--The look on Zack's face when I explained that you could tell Jon and Spencer apart on my shirt because Spencer has real shoes and Jon has flipflops.

--Jon Walker smells like Christmas, and Spencer Smith enjoys it when he does.

--Bob finding baby!Ray on YouTube

--Greta's story about the violin

--Spencer (and his band) think Prop 8 is total bullshit.

--Shane at Disneyland with Brendon's family for Christmas

--Bestfriend puppy. Just.

--Pete thinks Jennifer Aniston movies are something he needs to apologise for.

--"Gewawd"

--Jon knows Ryan is a vampire.

--Zack's body type is "more to love"

--Brendon should have been in his cage hours ago.

--Zack tells the fangirls that Brendon's hips don't lie

--Spencer's smile

--Bandit Lee. Oh, Ballato-Ways.

--Ryan and Spencer still have mutual birthday parties. With musical cakes.

--Partying with the Cobras means light beer and plastic guitars.

--Pete's unique interpretation of a swearing jar

--SYNCHRONIZED HALLOWEEN DANCES

--Zack plays hockey, and Ryan used to. The mental images!

--Brendon's church-singing pose

--Zack carrying Brendon offstage like a damsel

--Ryan keeps all the teddy bears.

--Jon didn't pack any shoes for like, three tours straight.

--Pear Liberal Studies, bless her. I miss your darling imaginary face, Pear.

--Brendon flipping a sharpie into the air and catching it over and over.

--The fact that Ryan thinks he can fool us into thinking he went to see the Backstreet Boys for Jackie and Crystal. Who were, like, seven at the time.

--Spencer hitting himself in the face and Ryan laughing so hard he lost track of the song

--Brendon's child-of-the-eighties vocabulary. Rad, fr srs.



I know I'm missing some, y'all. C'mon. Get on the internet and tell us all about the awesomest parts of our canon.



ETA: I know it isn't fair, and I'll try not to add any more. But Maple reminded me about that interview where BRENDON'S MOM STILL LOVES HIM. Which is my favorite thing in the world.
My headache is sort of blinding and my everywhere-ache is throbbing but I MUST CARRY ON, so: plans for today are 1) PIZZA, since yesterday the restaurants were closed, 2) a picnic blanket in the field of johnny-jump-ups behind my wee house with 3) notes, assignments, and lecture-recorder (which mostly contains one interview and me babbling to myself about ETW while driving, but whatever) and 4) the books I have to read and write reflective papers on. They also include 5) massive amounts of Advil Sinus and Excedrin, but I am hoping that lots of water and sun will reduce the need for that.

I am going to put on the least possible amount of clothes and soak up the sunshine; if I get all my papers in by Friday AND I WILL, then I will have three days to write my Big Bang in WHICH IS TOTALLY DOABLE, OKAY. (No, actually, it is. I completely wrote two-thirds of Lying Next to Me (~12,000 words) in two days. And I only need ~13,000 on ETW. I don't know whether to be proud or appalled that if I make myself focus, I can totally write that much that fast.)

There is totally a plan. I have lots of time. Everything is coming together. All is well.

...if I repeat it enough it will become true, right?


(Thank heaven for Zack and Spencer being sports-geeky and Brendon singing cereal jingles, that's all I have to say. I swear they got Twitters just to keep me from offing myself in times of stress.)
At my parents' house for Easter/various extended-fam birthdays, and they STILL. HAVE NOT FIXED. THE FUCKING INTERNET.

I am very, very cranky about it, in case you missed that. This was supposed to be my weekend to relax and reward myself for finishing the Paper of Dooooooom, and work on ETW--which is stored almost entirely on LJ or in GoogleDocs. And I mean, just, in general, flisting, surfing for decent fic, etc. IS MY IDEA OF RELAXING. So, yes. Cranky now.

Also, all of my time was somehow claimed by various members of my family without my input or permission...it's nothing I could really say no to, it's just annoying that I can't.

At the library atm collecting my damn fic material and flisting, though I think I may have missed quite a bit due to skimming. However, whoever posted that pic of Jon and Brendon "on safari" end quote? THANK YOU FOR THAT. I feel sufficiently restored to go on finishing all my mother's heinous errands.

Jon and Brendon, thank you SO MUCH. Just for existing prettily and letting people photograph you at peace. It makes me happy.
Had very long and involved dream in which Zack apparently manages a gas station (?) that sells really good cake (??) when he is not playing boywrangler. I won points, apparently, by driving up blasting Green Gentleman. It's possible this is why the cake was so cheap.

Anyway, I and my boyfriend (unrecognisable, disappeared and reappeared according to conversational needs, tall) somehow wound up in Zack's house. I don't think we were ever invited, but somehow we were there, anyway. Being offered tea.

And then for some reason we had to run away very fast and Zack had a secret escape tunnel through the back of his closet (as all good bodyguards do?) and the secret escape tunnel went through his secret workshop. Did y'all know that when Zack is relaxing he likes to make very pretty tiny glass animals? I didn't know that.

(Hi, subconscious. You're weird, but I enjoy you anyway.)
So exactly one year ago today, I announced to the world that I knew which one wore flipflops, and therefore I possibly needed to be smacked with a ruler.

As I told [livejournal.com profile] liketheroad when she did an end-of-the-year meme, every time I did one, all my answers ended up being, "bandom bandom bandom boys bandom friends bandom stories bandom bandom bandom." So I decided to do an end of the year review on my bandomversary instead.



This has been the most...incredible year. I have learned that Zack is my favorite, that Spencer in a beard is the prettiest thing on the earth, that all of My Chem are enormous dorks, that Brendon and cuddles are the surest way to touch my heart. I have learned that I am head-over-heels for Greta Salpeter, and that I love her band's sound.

I have found a muse that makes me want to write and write and writewritewrite--do you know I have posted NINE fics this year, and have fourteen in progress? The year before I posted two.



More--MOST OF ALL--I have found the most incredible friends. I have people whose days I can make brighter with a single LJ comment, and who return the favour. I have people who listen to me cry. I have discovered that one of my favorite people in the whole damn world lives in New Zealand--how would I ever have discovered that if we weren't both fathoms-deep in love with Panic at the Disco? How would I ever have written anything without [livejournal.com profile] harriet_vane filling my head with bunnies and [livejournal.com profile] liketheroad squeeing at me until they were all written? All of you have listened to me and laughed with me and squealed with me, and I'm so incredibly touched and honoured and lucky to have you in my life.



So I want to say thanks:

Thanks to Skids, who made me read it.

Thanks to [livejournal.com profile] emilyray, [livejournal.com profile] sociofemme, and [livejournal.com profile] calathea, for loving bandom in public so that I let her make me read it, since I knew they had good taste.

Thanks to all my pre-bandom friends, who didn't hit me with rulers, and who have stuck by me despite my tendency to flail over tiny ridiculous boys.

Thanks to Panic, the Hushies, MCR, FOB, and all the others for existing, for being themselves, for their music and their lives and their ridiculousness.

But most especially, thanks to all of YOU, whom I've met through our mutual insane love of these people, for being awesome friends, and for being yourselves--the girls I've come to love, adore, and positively cherish in this past year.


It's been an incredible trip for that girl a year back eying Ryan's makeup with faint alarm and telling her friend that she was sure these boys were very nice, they just weren't her type. I know she mocked and rolled her eyes and turned up her nose. I'm absolutely positive she never dreamed she'd arrive in a place where she adored this band so much she saw them perform three times in four months.

Thank god for awesome fic, that made her change her mind. Thank god for ridiculous boys, who made her fall for them. Thank god for the world's most amazing friends, who welcomed her right on in.

Thank god for bandom. It's been an awesome year.
This morning, I was greeted by two messages.

One was a hastily tapped out e-mail, just letting me know that [livejournal.com profile] shihadchick had just remembered that Zack once told her that "Brendon's hips don't lie."


The other was a comment to a sad post from yesterday, in which [livejournal.com profile] tanisafan sent me thoughts of Brendon tacklehugging people.


MY DAY IS AWESOME NOW.
Okay.

Okay.

SO.

A friend of mine knows how Zack Hall is the darling of my heart and how I adore him more than life and how the way he takes care of our boys just fills me with joy. She knows how every time I hear the "Don't Be Creepy" speech, I walk around with a stupid grin on my face for DAYS AND DAYS.

Last night she e-mailed me. She said she knew it wasn't my birthday yet, but it was totally my birthday in Australia, and, whatever, she was too excited to wait. Excited and intrigued, I downloaded the mp4 she'd sent me.

Dudes.

WE HAVE AN AUDIO RECORDING OF THE DBC SPEECH.

THAT'S RIGHT.

IT EXISTS.

http://www.megaupload.com/?d=67MIBMD6

BEST BIRTHDAY EVER, OR BEST BIRTHDAY IN THE HISTORY OF THE MULTIVERSE????




(P.S. I am not giving her credit right now because I do not want her on Zack's list, since, you know, I'm pretty sure he didn't authorize this, and SHE IS FAR TOO AWESOME to suffer for it. So I will not name her unless she comes and tells me to. But, just, all of you, send up a little prayer of thanks to the God of Fangirls for my lovely, lovely, wonderful, AMAZING friend, who has totally made my week. Not even seeing Greta is going to top having a version of Zack to carry around on my iPod, fr srs.)
Oh, hey, y'all, I just had a flash of memory:

ZACK PLAYS HOCKEY.


And we already know Ryan used to, at least.


...I'm going to leave you all to bask in the glow of that mental picture.
I totally get what people are talking about with the post-show adrenaline thing now. I'm euphoric and jittering and I feel like I could climb a mountain or proclaim my love to the world.

And I wasn't even performing.

Y'all, Brendon was in such a good mood. He was just glowing and bouncing all over the damn stage. I kept trying to pay attention to the others, too, but he just sucked up all my energy tonight and fed it back into me like an IV of pure joy.

The pictures they put on the screen in the background are really beautifully chosen, but again? Mostly, I was watching Brendon. Boy was on fire.

Also, the sexiness of Spencer drumming is hardly affected at all by his mustache. I totally still wanted to be thrown over the kick drum and ravished.

Ryan continues to be less British, which pleases me immensely, and the side-view screens caught a shot of Jon playing up to Spencer with an expression of bliss.

(Between what Zack said, not all of which will make it into this journal, and the reaction of the crowd, I think the boys are having a little trouble this tour--people aren't as excited to see them, they can't sing back (srsly, mostly? people sang 9itA, Day Met the Night and songs off Fever), and sometimes they LEAVE after Dashboard Confessional. Zack delayed the meet 'n' greet to round up extra fans, beyond those who'd actually won the drawing. The boys sang more Fever songs than I've seen them perform, and cut out such crowd classics as "waves of wooden legs", presumably because they knew nobody would know them...I swear, on Mad as Rabbits, I was one of maybe three people singing along. People mostly just stood there and stared during songs like "She's a Handsome Woman," where nobody knows what Ryan thinks he is talking about. There were people in the merch line who didn't know the "Reinvent Love" merch design was for Panic!

So, you know. When you go? Be REALLY LOUDLY FANGIRLY.)


OH! ETA: The Cab? Hardly failed AT ALL last night. Even Singer. Even Cash. I was kinda disappointed, I promised the baby bro he would find them hilarious. However, I kinda hope they do get big, because when Dashboard pulled Ian up to play with them he kept doing the signature Cab Bounce, and I think he may have been irreparably damaged so that he can't help it anymore.
THINGS ABOUT M&G BEFORE I FORGET:

--Spencer says his mustache is because Zack is growing his beard in, so Spence decided to shave his off. Balance. Personally I still think this is a cover for the bet he lost, and you will not convince me otherwise

--relatedly, in giving the DBC speech, Zack stopped and corrected himself--wait, Spencer doesn't have a beard anymore, he has a "wierd little mustache thing"--my sentiments exactly, Zack.

--however, I will say it's not as bad in person and when he's had enough sleep so he can look out through his eyelids

--Bden's applebottom is round and firm and tight. Zack promises. (!!!!!!!!) (ot3 of shame ftw)

--Zack was two cookies in before he realised they were full of hair

--There IS a don't be creepy reason for only using their sharpies; Zack didn't elaborate and frankly I'm not sure I wanted him to; urgh

-- the new keyboardist is Adrian and he uses the phrase "broke my face"

-- I spoke sensible English and remembered to ask Spencer about the shave and give Brendon his card; I forgot to tell Ryan I like the blog, tell anybody I'm excited for the new album, or look semi-sane in the picture. But I didn't tell Spencer his mustache makes me sad, so on the whole I think I win

--Zack wouldn't let me film, sorry!

--we need a bandom version of fiddlesticks; I spent most of our ridiculously long wait with an awesome girl my own age who clearly knew ALL about them, but I couldn't quite make myself ask her if she has an OTP

--this tour is very BADLY organized and Zack said so; watch out, y'all, I predict his mood will only grow worse the more he has to deal with it (he was awesome once we were past all the enormous problems caused by the venue etc, but MAN he was pissy up to then)
Okay, we're supposed to be going in seven minutes from now; Zack has yet to show his face AT ALL (!!), and there are only four people in line for the M&G.

Um, yeah.

And I so wanted Zack to be in a good mood! *sigh* They'll be running too late for the speech or anything, I can feel it.

On plus side have met very nice fan my own age.
With [livejournal.com profile] shihadchick's encouragement, I am drawing a new Panic drawing for them to autograph for me, because I am that kind of geek.

I'm kind of terrified of the M&G now, though, because the words "Spencer's mustache makes me sad" will come out of my mouth. I don't even know exactly how my babble will get to that point, but I have faith. My mouth is that kind of mouth.

...maybe I should pretend to be deaf-mute and write them ALL thank-you notes.


ON THE PLUS SIDE, however, I finally have a favorite boy as well as a favorite band member! Sorry, Spencer, you are no longer tied for first-place boy. Not until it grows back. Brendon, congratulations.

Zack is still my FAAAAAAVORITE, though. *goes back to staring at her desktop photo of Zack and a teeny tiny itty bitty dogling*
Guys, I'm going to the Utah M&G! Eeep!

This time, I will be cool, collected, witty, charming, and...

Well, okay, realistically, this time I will try not to fail QUITE AS MUCH as I did last time. ^_^

HEADS UP

Sep. 11th, 2008 06:57 am
ATTENTION PLEASE, ESPECIALLY TO THOSE OF YOU MEETING US IN VEGAS:

The Rock Band Tour (not just Vegas) M&G Drawings form has gone up! I don't know whether it was a failure on the part of my e-mail or on the part of the Northern Downpour site or what, but I didn't receive notification and I figured if I hadn't, you might not have either.

It's the third entry down on the news as you log in. Apparently it's long odds this time round, but it's still worth a try--I promise it's fun! You get to hear Zack's speech! And...well, okay, in my case, meet Spencer Smith's eyes and forget how to speak and completely FAIL AS A HUMAN BEING, but maybe you'll be better at this than I am, and you can have a little mini-conversation with our boys!
DUDE.

...they're playing next to a pool, apparently? Ryan is going to fall in and electrocute himself, this CANNOT END WELL. I do not think Zack approved this venue!


Also, hey, does the Hard Rock Pool venue have assigned seating? Do I need to buy tickets with my fellow fangirls? Or do we fight for our places up close like in, um, the only venue I have ever seen rock bands in? (OMG I'M SUCH A NEWBIE I KNOW NOTHING. I DO NOT EVEN KNOW HOW TO FIND THE ANSWERS TO THESE QUESTIONS.)


In a sensible world I would simply e-mail my friend who manages a Vegas band, and ask her these questions, but now I'm all like DUDE SHE HAS HER OWN PROBLEMS and SHE ACTUALLY KNOWS SOMETHING ABOUT MUSIC DO NOT EMBARRASS YOURSELF BY BEING SUCH A FAILY N00B and um, apparently it is less humiliating to post this publicly to my LJ and let her either comment and answer these questions or else ignore me kindly so that I can pretend she just didn't see it.

I AM MADE OF FAIL WHEN IT COMES TO THIS STUFF. I AM IN IT FOR THEIR STUPID FACES, OKAY, I AM LAME LIKE THAT.


ALSO OMG I AM TOTALLY POSTING THIS AND NOW NONE OF THE AWESOME PEOPLE I WAS SUPPOSED TO BE MEETING WILL BE WILLING TO ADMIT THEY KNOW ME. EXCEPT SKIDS, AND THAT IS BECAUSE I HAVE TOTALLY LOVED HER THROUGH TIMES WHEN SHE WAS MORE RIDICULOUS THAN I AM BEING RIGHT NOW.


(But apparently taking my baby brother to see Panic for his birthday is a Good Plan, and also apparently he approves of Dashboard Confessional, which makes me, you know, happy for him and stuff.)

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