(no subject)
Aug. 27th, 2004 01:39 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
elucrehThey expect my great-grandmother to be gone by the end of the day. I'm not thinking about it. I can't afford to have a breakdown in this office.
Everybody will be gone Saturday, and I think I will use that day (after cleaning as quickly as possible) to hide under the covers and be warm and safe for a little while. I can fulfill more of my Anime-watching orders, too.
And then try to write. I have so much to express...*sigh* All my angst gives me bunnies.
That's a really weird mental image.
Everybody will be gone Saturday, and I think I will use that day (after cleaning as quickly as possible) to hide under the covers and be warm and safe for a little while. I can fulfill more of my Anime-watching orders, too.
And then try to write. I have so much to express...*sigh* All my angst gives me bunnies.
That's a really weird mental image.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
(no subject)
Date: 2004-08-27 12:55 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-08-27 12:58 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-08-27 01:24 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-08-27 01:47 pm (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2004-08-27 05:45 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-08-27 05:59 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-08-27 06:00 pm (UTC)Looking forward to it.
(no subject)
Date: 2004-08-27 09:21 pm (UTC)Y'know, we go to so much trouble to protect little ones from the shock of death, but in truth it's much harder on adults. I'm confident that your great-grandmother had a rich, full life and will go when she's ready. I realize that probably doesn't comfort you much right now, but I will hope that her passing will be/is/was peaceful and dignified.
*Hugs*
MM
(no subject)
Date: 2004-08-27 10:33 pm (UTC)Katie...
Date: 2004-08-28 12:44 pm (UTC)How are you?
I was so upset when I first heard Gram had had another stroke. The worst part was, the family had talked about it at dinner when I wasn't there, and no one had bothered to tell me...
I found out a day later. For some reason, I was just so mad no one had bothered to tell me, and that if I hadn't figured out something was up, I might not have found out at all.
Anyway, when I did find out, I cried for a long time. I knew she was going to die. Selfishly, all I could think was that I did not want her to go. I did not want the times I saw her this summer to be the last time I ever see her in this life.
This morning when I got up my father told me her health was declining rapidly, that she was barely breathing and unconscious, and is expected to die today, and the tears came again.
I just have realized how much I love that woman. She was the only one besides my parents and the doctors that was there when I was born. When I was younger I used to dream that she and my Grandma Madsen (who is the same age) had died, and wake up and cry and cry. I've gotten to spend many wonderful times with her, which I am grateful for, but I'm so sorry I didn't get to spend more time with her since I was old enough to appreciate it. So sorry it's been years since I wrote her a letter. So sorry I never got to say goodbye or tell her that I loved her one more time.
Sorry I'm rambling on and on. Lol, maybe I'll paste this into my own journal. But I knew you would understand. In fact I came to the library because my computer is down and I really wanted to look up your livejournal and find where you wrote about her and write about her too.
I love you so much, Katie.
I'm hoping and praying I get to come down for the funeral. My dad says he doesn't know if it's possible. My mom for sure will go, but please pray that I will get to come too, because I really think I need to do that for myself and even for Gram.
I also would get to see all of you!! Which is only a wonderful bonus, but means enough in itself.
Anyway, I probably won't get anything you write back until I get to a computer again. Try anyway if you like.
Always and always,
Cousin Em
Re: Katie...
Date: 2004-08-28 02:28 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-08-28 09:31 pm (UTC)Buckbeaky
(no subject)
Date: 2004-08-29 04:58 pm (UTC)"I would have you smile again, not grieve for those whose time has come."
-Theoden
(no subject)
Date: 2004-08-29 06:06 pm (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2004-08-29 06:43 pm (UTC)